The Labor Story

Alright you guys, it's here. THE LABOR STORY. I'll try to keep it short. But don't count on it.

People say the third goes really quick. I guess when I think really quick I think quick like no bake cookies, and easy like birthing a bar of soap...it should just plop out right?

Tuesday I went in for my check up. NO progress. So Dr. Luka stripped my membranes. Super sore, uncomfortable, a little pain. No contractions. That night, no contractions. Super depressed and painfully uncomfortable was my night. All that day and night I had prayed to go into labor because I did not want to be induced Thursday morning (Tom was flying to TX, thus the induction). All day and night I cried thinking about the Pit drip. Wednesday morning I woke up feeling more sore, then exactly when Tom got to school I started contractions. I just knew that I was having the baby today. I texted Tom...12 min. apart. A bit of blood. Since I'm an all day laborer, I decided to go on with my schedule: Lydia speech therapy, Costco, Preschool, Tom home, go to hospital, have baby, eat dinner, go to sleep. By the time I hit Costco it was lunch time and contractions were 6 min apart and getting hard to walk through. Funny enough I saw Lindsey Samahon from the ward and told her casually I was in labor and hope to be in the hospital that night. See, when I had Paul I was in labor at 8 in the morning, walked all day and had him by 6 that night, so I knew I had time. When I got to the car things started to burn and my appetite fell off the face of the earth. Oh well, Lyd needed to go to preschool, maybe I was dialated to a 3 or 4 by now. Good for me! Tom got the afternoon from the clinic so he came home. By 2pm I was doing the breathing thing and trying hard not focus on the burning contractions that were now 4 mins apart. We made it to pick up Lyd at 3:15 and took the kids to Paige's house. By 5pm we made it into the hospital. Contractions 3 minutes apart and really I couldn't really feel my legs when the contractions hit. YES!!! I must be a 7 almost ready for the baby I thought. SO the other thing is this: with Paul I felt this way at an 8 or so. I remember having this one really bad contraction like I was going to faint. After that I climbed on the table and 12 minutes later Paul was here. It was glorious. I've anticipated having another natural birth. Oh, I was so ready to do it again. Okay, back to the story. I get up on the table at 5:30 in moaning pain. The nurse checks me and I remember the nurse saying these words before the check, "The third baby is so tricky." and that's exactly what this labor was...tricky. I'm dilated to a 3. A 3!!!! I about went bisserck. They were going to send me home, but decided to let me walk for an hour and be checked again.

So here I am the only woman in labor walking up and down the halls about ready to faint at each contraction. It really got to the point where I'd start having anxiety every time the contraction hit. The pain was that bad. I really should have just gone back to the room and got hooked up to the epideral. What was I thinking? So an hour later I go back. A 5. Crap. Only five more hours of this and we should have a baby. Oh wow, that thought just about sent me through the roof, but I'm a pretty tough chick and I have this feeling, "If I could just break my water, she'd come." So the Doc shows up, checks me. Yep, a 5. Do I want an epideral? Do I want to see what breaking my water does? Okay, break my water. HOLY MOLY and then some. It's 7:20 (why do they set a clock right in front of you?). By this time I'm hooked up to an IV and computer and whatnot. I just want to say about 20 seconds after the doc broke my water and it gushed like the hoover dam (sorry details) crap hit the fan for me or should I say in technical terms I hit "Transition". I grabbed the bed post and heaved my self forward and yelled with everything I had inside of my lungs, "OOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!" and that's all I could get out. I think I really scared the doc for a split second, he said, "Well, I wasn't expecting that." Then for the next five minutes all I could do was scream for the epideral. Of course you know how long it takes for those people to make a five minute walk. I went from a 5 to a 10 in about 10 minutes. That and the next 7 minutes after that were the most painful writhering, blistering, hell burning, torturous minutes of my life. I honestly hit the wall...over and over again. I cried to Tom to stop, to the nurse to let me go. After each blinding contraction I would look at the door and think about ripping out my Iv and computer stuff. I was sincere when I yelled, "Just stop the contractions, I don't want it any more, keep the baby in!" My body was burning up and all I could do was listen to all these morons tell me what a good job I was doing while they enjoyed a nice cup of Joe. Oh, btw Tom wasn't included. If it weren't for him holding me down and telling me I had to do this I think I really would have made a break for it. He was the only person I could mentally hold onto. Okay, and by the way the doc went down stairs to finish his meeting. They paged him as soon as he got down stairs and when he made it back up and got gloves on the head was out. So, the nurse says not to push, but who are we kidding, like I had a choice. I decided I was gonna bear down and not let up till this thing was out and my body stopped the chinese torture. And I did, until they asked Tom to ask me to stop and make me breathe. Really? You want me to stop? Would you stop running from an attacking Grizzly just to breathe? For real. So, I feel the head coming right down the birth canal and I ask the nurse to get over there and catch my baby. The head comes out, the doc slaps on his gloves and thrusts his hands inside to bring out the shoulders. Wow, I didn't think I could be in more pain..but I was and then he turns her! What?! I blanked out for a second and then instant relief. There's the bar of soap. Plop right on my belly. Now, she was beautiful and lovely, and I should have been overflowing with joy. I should have, but mostly I was in so much pain just a moment before that now all I could feel was shock. It was so crazy. It did take 15 minutes for me to feel this love and bond and joy that I should have felt as soon as she came out. So that is really the main reason why I am such a fan of the epideral now. I know, it's a hard recovery. I get it. But really, instead of enduring this insurmountable labor, I should have anticipated this beautiful child and covered her with me tears. If I ever give birth again it will be with the aid of an epideral. I love all you who love natural births, if Julia had been anything like Paul I'd still be riding that bandwagon, but seriously, I love you epideral. And I'm glad I never have to go through that again. And really, Julia came out with no complications and I'm as healthy as a horse, so I have nothing to complain about, but I'm so glad we live in a modern age where we can choose. Well, the baby needs to eat, so I'm done. There ya go. The Labor Story and I'm sure you are all so happy to hear it. Now your life is complete.