This is my family

I don't believe in having one best memory or moment. I think they build on each other. But look at this moment, to me it brings tears to my eyes. We are watching the sun rise. Simple folks who love to be together, watching a sunrise. Simple folks, who love to be together, watching a sunrise, who also need a banana. A strong and gentle father who is at the helm of our lives, a chocolate eyed daughter captivated by the dawn, a little boy who is, of course, so content to eat a banana on his father's lap anywhere they are, and a mother...a tearful mother who relishes in these three wonderful people. A thankful mother to God for the windows of heaven in her life.

Burton

This is actually the trial run cake for Martha's shower, but alas, I couldn't help but think about my soon-to-be nephew. I wish I could be home for the shower, the arrival. I can't believe my baby sister is having a baby. Look at that bum...just want to pinch it! The cutest little fondant bum. I actually made the fondant myself which was fun, but dried out quickly as you can see all the dry cracks.

This cake was supposed to be 3-tier, but it looked better two-tier, so on Martha's cake I switched it up to be a taller cake all together. The Ganache was great to work with and I loved the buttercream. The combination was like smooth chocolate heaven. Much better than Dove or Ghirardelli.

So, Burton this really is not your cake, but all the while I made it, I thought of you. I can't wait to come out and hold you till my arms fall off. You better get all your time in with everyone else, because I plan on making up for lost time! And might I add, Lydia and Paul are excited about little Burton too.

Better Week

I always mean to post a "better" post after I've vented, so my bad days aren't the only thing you have to remember me by, but I got so busy this last week that I haven't had time to post.

Thanks to all for your concern and helpful tips. I'm extremely grateful for all of you. I can't believe the out pouring of love and concern I've recieved. Gee wiz, if sympathy is that easy I'll just post my woes more often! jk. But really, thank you. Friends are the frosting of life.

I'm doing some experimental work in the food department, and actually, it's been enjoyable...more so than I thought.
Lyd is back to "regular" (althought that's funny bc she's never really been regular before). I've cut out 80% of her processed foods and 90% of dairy. Sorry all you white flour snacks, you've got the boot at our house. I scrimage every ingredient list...not that I wasn't doing that before. If it's easily digestable and especially full of water than it's a go, if not we decide if it's worth the cup of prune juice following it. Usually if it's not a big celebration than we eat fruit for a treat. It's been good.

I however, have been up to my ears in cake and frosting. And as soon as I upload my pictures you will see the decadent frostings and ganache and cake I've been whipping up. Oh, I loved making martha's baby cake. I SO wish I could make one for my sis who's having a baby around the same time. ..Little Burton, I'll make ya a cake and eat it too! Tom was so nice to take the kids about while I stayed at home baking and decorating these fun little cakes. I love my Tom, he even helped me with the fondant!

I just love Lydia's Preschool

So, if you live in Philadelphia and your child happens to have a speech issue, I highly recommend the Thorne Preschool associated with Bryn Mawr College. Look it up.

Seriously folks, they are amazing. I had a come-apart today. Now, I'm not a wacko, but every once in a while I have a hard day concerning Lydia. I think it's just the way mom's are built. We worry about our littles. We worry about milestones, eating, sleeping, pooping, hitting, tantrums, fitting in, standing out, being independent and the whole deal that comes with having a child. So, put that normal worrering (is that a word) into a child that has special needs. Now, I know Lydia's needs are mild, and I'm not complaining, I'm just saying that it puts a little more tears into my normal worries.

Last night Lydia spent all night throwing up...again. I just hate it. She's not sick, she's just constipated. It comes with her deal, all the kids deal have constipation. But it is so hard to watch her go through this (I'll spare you the gruesome, gagging- for- breathe details) and then have the doctors write it off with some stupid laxative (the more I go to the doctors the more I find they just want to treat the symptom). This morning I felt like I was blindly sabatodging my daughter by feeding her foods she can't digest and then trying to undo the mess with a potent drug that, to say the very least, does not do her any favors long term*(that was a very generous statement I just gave Miralax. I hate Miralax).

Okay, anyway, so this morning I was terribly upset. Lydia has preschool at noon and I'm also trying to hold in all my tears so my children won't see me cry. By the time I get to her preschool I look pretty good, that is until I opened my mouth to say hi. Then two of the therapists and a teacher immediately knew something was wrong. There was a parent there, she also picked up on it. They brought me into a room and just let me cry it out and cry it out I did. I will admit, sometimes I feel like I can't talk about what I feel with my friends or my family or people that don't have a child with a special need. It's like that I'd be in some way complaining about Lydia or our situation. The therapists were awesome. The parent asked me if I wanted to go for a coffee (that was funny, the first time I was asked for coffee was when i was a complete wreck). We ended up talking in her car for 30 minutes. It felt wonderful to have a mother in my boat, that she is going through many of the same things I am.

Well that was a long post, but I'm so grateful for a school that provides so much more than a secure and loving learning place for Lyida, but some healing ground for me too.

And I can't be done until I render thanks again to my husband who takes long drives with me when 22q is bigger than the mom. And thanks to my sister who talks long talks when my husband can't be home. I wish everyday I was a super hero, but I appreciate the great listening ear and pep talks to help me feel like I can get back on my horse.

Can We Fix IT? YES WE CAN

Around here, you never know what needs fixin'. Good thing Lyd pulls her weight. I keep telling Paul, "Enjoy it while it lasts, once you turn three you're going to have to find a trade, bring in the bacon, earn your keep." You know, good hard labor... that kind of thing. Never too early to start, right?

Good Ole Lyd

Lydia asked to sleep with Paul one night. I pretty much cried when I saw these tender kids. Check out Paul's football.

Check out this cheeser. Seriously, she cracks me up

Vaccuming the wood floor...some would call it child labor. Not me, I consider it "creative" helping. There's alot of creative helping that goes on in our house.

Lyd was So excited for Christmas

And I mean so excited.

How funny are they? They were just sitting there having a nice chat when I found them.

I just love her enthusiasm to have a great time no matter what we are doing.

Just Another Day in the Life of Paul

Paully has more character than I've ever seen in a two year old. Yes, that is a pose just for the camera.

Like Father Like Son

Take #2 A bit too much spice, so I asked for a big smile...btw the pictures are out of order

Take #3 Just what the doctor ordered.

Take #1 I was underwhelmed so I told Paul to spice it up.

We were sitting down for dinner. Paul decided he was just too tired to eat.

Of course another great pose. He does the silliest things and that's why we like him so much.